Those are the same feelings that I am going through. We have sex maybe once a month, but it's like quick get it over with and go to bed. He won't let me see him and we have no intimate moments at all. As far as the bi/gay thing I am not sure if that is part of his issues too. I had heard it on the streets that he was gay, but also heard it was something his ex-wife started, and I also know that he worked for a man that was bisexual so I don't know if he ever had anything with him. But my question is, if he isn't gay why is there absolutely no intimacy. After he told me about what happened when he was younger I could understand why he didn't enjoy some of the things that we shared, but no sex at all is what is so strange. There is nothing I can do to "spark" the mood, and like you said it makes my self esteem go down hill. I am glad I have found this place to talk because I have only shared it with two of my closest friends, but they have no idea of what I am going through.. Thanks for listening