Love is so much more than a feeling, I am learning that love is a choice. People say they fall in and out of love because they are depended on a feeling and when the feeling is no longer there than they choose to terminate the relationship. When one realizes that love is more than a feeling than we can begin to except someone regardless of fill in the blank and the relationship has a chance to be transcendent.
Love is a transcending thing it surpasses our own understanding and goes beyond feelings. There is no limit to what love can bring to someone's life when allowed to grow. Love brings in forgiveness love brings a plethora of things along with it . Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
Love when enacted can cover a multitude of sins or disastrous situations and circumstances. The absence of love is a direct result of a choice . We all have the ability to Choose to exercise this precious precious gift. Love does transcend anything that can be thrown at it , that is unless it is rejected . Whether or not someone receives the love is not the matter at hand . Regardless whether received or not we still have the choice to love in spite of someones willingness to receive love from us.
As soon as we recognize there is an absence of love either from our part or the other party we need to begin to exhibit love and maintain it's divine qualities mentioned above. When you begin to feel in such a way that you do not want to be treated by someone you should immediately recognize the need for love to intervene.
It is this distinct feeling that warns us and we recognize when we are feeling ... hey I do not like the way I am being treated ... the choice is placed within our hands to invoke love. Nine times out of ten we want to reciprocate the feeling and cause the other party or parties to feel or experience what we have admitted to ourselves that we do not like.
This allows everyone involved to open the door for other forces such as bitterness ,anger,hatred and so on. There is always a point in a conversation when you can see a shift and the mutual respect love and honor is being breached. We have to not only discern when this shift occurs but to act appropriately when we do notice the shift.
Pride is one thing that wants to stand tall and block out love , but ask yourself at the end of the day is pride worth it ? I submit that it is not and only causes more chaos and confusion. Love learns from it's mistakes it does not continue to make them love wants to be corrected in order to move forward . Love needs room to grow everyday in our lives and humanity as a whole needs to choose love instead of rejecting love.
Love settles arguments it does not allow them to continue. The only reason there is such a thing is an augment is because of the lack or absence of love. The next time you have a disagreement with someone keep in mind this core principal and that is love the person enough to be willing to walk away from the disagreement if it begins to cross the line of love ,because remember love is a choice after all it is more than a feeling.
Feelings will want to carry the discussion right across the boundary line of love and right over the cliff into the pit of divisiveness. Feelings can be fooled they are not reliable they do not correctly interpret a persons heart or motives. We have to be smart and learn from what has worked and that which has not in order to continue to allow love to be a progressive action in our daily lives. Love put into action is powerful and can change lives .
Sadly there are not enough people who have received enough love in their life to properly give it to others in the genuine way love was meant to be given . When a person does not know how to love themselves they give a distorted kind love out. This kind of love will not end up being authentic in the sense of , it will end up being "the because of type of love" . I love you because of this or that , this love does not end up being the genuine kind of love. The genuine kind of love is in spite of this or that.
The because of love becomes a pattern and as soon as a good enough reason for love to be receded it will be snatch away in order to protect oneself from further self perceived emotional harm. When one loves themselves in the proper sense they will not place themselves in position to be used misused or abused because they hold themselves in high enough regard because the CHOOSE to.
Love is a choice it goes beyond feelings. The person that does not love themselves Chooses to not love themselves and it should be obvious to themselves but they are ruled by feelings which is in a sense fooling or blinding their mind from giving and receiving love in the proper sense.
We all know such people no matter what is said or done they do not respond to love and can not see the love within themselves. Explaining it to such people in this manner might help them understand that they need to Choose to love themselves instead of just saying "you should love yourself". Everyone needs to be taught love is a choice it does not amount to your feelings alone.
Now what will you do when put in any of these positions that I have outlined above ?
Will you choose to love will you choose to argue ?
Will you choose to love yourself or reject it ?
Will you choose to disengage someone before the discussion crosses the boundaries of treating someone less than you would want to be treated ?
Will you recognize the need to explain to someone who does not love themselves ,that love is after all a choice that in spite of the way they have been used misused or abused in their past they can choose to love themselves because it is not based on feelings alone ?
Let us put love into action and change the world one encounter at a time . Thanks for reading ~ Nathan Tice