He said that I was not available to him emotionally or physically as a child, that we were negligent parents, that we acted as if nothing had happened and that we would not have a relationship until I acknowledged that I had a problem with porn.
Your efforts show much caring.
When I was young viewing porn started innocently but led to confusion over time, especially in the absence of my father's honest talks about it.
When I relive some parts of my childhood that remain confused, feelings arise that are difficult to understand. When someone risks some deeper emotion and gives me their own appraisal of similar experiences in words that say they want to establish greater trust, then I have room to breathe and a context to explore what really happened.
Hope you can keep exploring ways to communicate and keep open the possibility for more understanding.