dear Re: jj78,
i am deeply sorry to hear about what happened to you.
your story really hit me deep.
the mention of church made me cry.
i can't really say what i feel, it's too much.

but congratulations on your milestones and anniversaries.
i love reading about the amazing progress you have been posting.
you sure have accomplished a lot in a short time.
great inspiration.

i thought i would give you this quote from reality2k4 who said it better than i could.
Originally Posted By: reality2k4
When you are abused, nobody wants to know!
Why? Because they don't know how to.

your statement is so simple and true, reality2k4.
it says what i could not.
the often overlooked tragedy of csa collateral damage.
it really made me think hard. ouch! that hurts.
(thinking hard and feeling, that is)
i can't begin to imagine the damage i have inflicted on my emotional ecosystem.
then i realize...
i always feel so involved and responsible and even guilty when someone i care about get sexually abused.
and, in some abstract way, that feeling extends to every abused child i become aware of.
it feels personal.
the protector in me grabs the steering wheel.
i have to hold myself back.
it is difficult to get involved.
think strategy, act efficiently.