Hi Dave,
You were conditioned to be helpless by the abuse in your childhood. When it happened you reacted indeed like the rabbit in the headlights. Instead of fight or flight you froze, It is an automatic reaction the thinking reasoning part of your brain was bypassed, so you froze, just like the rabbit you describe. The freezing was the helpless reaction to intense fear, the fear triggered by your childhood abuse. Freezing does not mean that you wanted it to happen, liked it or asked for it, in fact the freezing reaction shows the very opposite.

I am glad you were able to share it here, I hope you will soon get to a point where you understand that you have nothing to feel guilty about.