I see one idiot who screwed up all the lives around him with the poisonous looks and smell that a truly foul creature posesses. He has never lived a normal life. What friends he has, run away when they truly see what was once covered.

A friend for 20 years (really close friend) just put me on the "pay-no-mind" list. He was present for me when we filmed the 700-Club thing. He was the visitation supervisor of record for me and my kids during the vicious divorce. He took me on trips when I was ready to drop-dead from strain. He was the only one to visit me in the hospital last time I was in.

I would say some misunderstanding is at work here, except that things like this have happened over and over in my life ever since disclosure.

Too needy, too freaky, too gross, too icky to really be there, not enough brass, too wimpy...? I just don't know. I've let this thing take its time, but its been about 5-months now with no contact at all. We live in the same town. Today, he defriended me from FaceBook, which is the preferred method for everyone here to communicate.

My sister has completely written me of (including FB) as bottom-feeding sea-freak ever since disclosure.

This all hurts like hell and I don't get it. I don't get why its happening, but its like the alienation found in childhood all over again.

I have been certain to not over-lean on these folks, or anyone for that matter. That's the Ts' jobs. But this is telling me that people are willing to cut me loose for something that I AM, and that makes me sick.