Hey Tyr
I've been there myself Tyr, "it's hard to think of as rape".. but that's what it is. By forcing you .. it was by no means consentual. Your sexual reactions where physical/mental responseonly and you were not in control of the outcome.
No, you are not a "willing victim" .. we all have various relationships that we question .. it's human man.
Good post .. my friend
My Story : http://www.malesurvivor.org/board/ubbthr...4645#Post434645