Hi Kevin. You did a really good job here of detailing how you've progressed in your recovery. I'm glad you've found a place in life where you've experienced something that feels like happiness. When someone has been through what you've been through, it's huge just to be able to say that. I also agree that true happiness is something that has to come from within. If you belive you've found it, even for a moment, that means you can find it. So, even if it goes away, you found it once, which to me means you're capable of finding it again. Good luck with that. Peace,