Quick update:
I started re-reading Pete Walker's stuff about CPTSD (two survivor marriage here), and I have so much work to do on myself. Blurred boundaries, extreme hypervigilance on my part, emotional flashbacks for us both...

After two days of barely talking, I had him meet me at a bar where could get a little space for ourselves. I asked him to read the emotional flashback stuff by Walker (peer-reviewed, in case H balked a little), and it hit home.

he softened a little, but deep down, we are on the same page, just at vastly different recovery and life points. It happens.

I'm taking the time we're more distant emotionally to get into heavier crafting again. It's good for me.

Big bump, but that's alright.