When I graduated high school back in 1993 I was a skinny-ass little bean pole, weighing in at just over 150 lbs. I am 6'0" tall and may have been a little bit shorter than that back then but not by much. Ether way, I was skinny as hell and maintained my weight no matter what I ate.

As an adult, my diet and fairly sedentary lifestyle caught up with me eventually, especially when I started working in the pizza business in 1998. By 2008, I had grown to about 220 lbs and was clearly overweight. As a New Years resolution that year, I swore that I was going to loose 50 lbs by 2009. I committed myself to a strict regimen of diet and exercise and by late October of 2008 I hit 170 lbs.

Since then, I have gone back up to 185 lbs but a lot of that weight is from added muscle and not added fat. (Ok, ok, some of it is probably from added fat but not most of it.) I don't always maintain the best diet and I drink way to much beer but I have not broken my exercise regimen in all of the 5 and 1/2 years.

I have to be honest and admit that sometimes I wonder why I do it. Because of my CSA issues, I do not and will not ever want a relationship with a woman or a man. I do not want to have sex with anybody and I could care less if anyone was attracted to me. So, why do I do it? Who the fuck am I trying to impress?

The answer has to be that I'm doing it for me. I'm doing it because I want to look good for myself and be able to have some sense of pride that I actually achieved something in my miserable life. When I look in the mirror I want to be able to say, "Damn, that dude is in pretty good shape! Who is that guy? He must have done a lot of work on himself." If other people can look at what I see in the mirror and find it attractive, fine, but it doesn't matter. They can't have it anyway, no matter who they are. It's all mine and I don't wanna share it with nobody! The fact is, I do this for myself and nobody else. If nothing else, I think that's why others should do it to. YOU gotta do it for YOU! Peace,