Hi standingstrong, wow, you wrote about many interesting and insightful things in your post and I must add that yo did a lot in your personal journey, I congratulate you on your courage.
Breaking our isolation is very tough and difficult task. We used to live alone for so long (not literately) so it is not easy to break it.
When we are stepping out of our comfort zone it is easy to feel vulnerable and fragile. So please take care for yourself in first place while you trying it. Don't push yourself if you are not feel good about it. It is terrible important to keep and build our confidence with small steps. I can't expect big and quick changes in my life so sometimes I need to recall to myself that I'm expecting too much, that I need to follow my inner feelings and to be aware of positive changes that I already made.
Keep sharing with us!