Hey Still Around --
Oh, if it was a perfect world, huh? Your post brought to mind some of my post-disclosure experiences, one in particular I haven't wanted to talk about.
I'd say it's about 50/50 on success. Good with my birthmother. Good with a cousin who shares my name (and has brought us closer). Good with two of my best friends.
Not so good with the school, the church, public agencies...who have blown me off.
What bothered me was disclosure to my step-sister who was my advocate years ago in facing down the self-absorbed mommybitch (adopted mother) concerning my gayness. I hadn't spoken with my step-sister in years, but we had a wonderful two-hour conversation a few months ago which I posted here. Currently she's separated from an alcoholic husband. Her son is an adult now.
I wanted to break the silence on both the CSA and the parental abuse that put me on track for it. And I gained validating insight from her on the pattern of parental abuse. Whether or not she responded further, I made it clear that was up to her. She's chosen not to respond further. I understand she's dealing with her own shit at the moment, but I was disappointed.
As already pointed out, some people can't handle it. Some have no clue how/if to handle it. It's not in their experience.
Surprisingly - for me - I've been able to put most of the disappointment aside because I've gained a reconnection to a cousin who was like Dad's second son...and is becoming like an older brother to me.