Originally Posted By: crazy gecko

Sometimes it still hurts like hell, but I'd take the pain over going back to being just a toy, any day.

crazy gecko, thanks for pointing out that the commitment to be real stands right next the willingness to engage pain.

For so many years I have passed by people who had the courage to do this in favor of spending time with people who seemed more whole because they could talk a good number of circles around my pain, making me feel like I didn't have to deal with it.

Being a toy no longer means standing my ground, taking a good deep breath and letting the words come. It's going to be a new way of living, this real. It's going to be hard. It will probably scrape the bottom of the ugly barrel at times.

But I'm betting it will be me.

Lose the drama; life is a poem.