hi leb,

in many ways you are very lucky that he is so honest to you. that also shows he doenst want to act out on his issues which the rape caused. he wants you to be there for him and help him to find the real him - who he would have been without the abuse.

just read thru this site, read a lot of things, books....and also make your boyfriend read things, talk with him and make sure he can always be honest to you. if you get that right, you will help him heal and the feelings he has right now dont have to stay the same.

he told you all this because he did NOT want to act out, because he did NOT want to cheat you in any way. for you these things might hurt you at first, but when you understand better, they wont. it has nothing to do with you, its just part of the parcel the abuse caused him to have and he needs to recover.

dont forget you also exist smile

everything is always okay in the end, if it's not, then it's not the end