I toook part in our mens ministry and our responsibility to ourselves and our brides. To seek out and pursue our brides as the Bible shares that Christ did for the church. Many men there, concurred that porn is a problem for them. It's amazing how we gloss over porn and how many of us say we'd never do that and month's later, ask ourselves, "how did I get here?". It was pretty rewarding to have open and candid dialog and ownership of where each of us have or may still have struggles with.
I was a bit nervous as I shared my story and that porn may be a symptom of sexual abuse. I shared the numbers and suggested there may be at least two others here who may have been abuse. The room became thick with silence. However, a couple of guys spoke up and I observed a number of non-verbal responses that made everyone think that, while they didn' want to talk about it, acknowledged that they were "there" in at least understanding. That counseling with a trained person would help and that being opened to not judging but accepting where each of us were at and lifting each other in prayer and support.
I felt that maybe I overstepped the bounds of acceptable discussion, however, I sense that it was something someone felt, but now, the "whys" become more identifiable.
Forgiving does not always mean everything goes back to the way it was. There are still natural consequences for what was done.