Thanks for all of your replies. I've started going to Al Anon and hope I can get the tools to detach there... He wasn't just sleeping with other women but actually having relationships with them, too. At least three that I've confronted and gotten the truth from. I'm not proud of contacting these women and know it's total codependence craziness, though I don't blame myself for getting nuts over the cheating and the lies.
Have any of you gotten past the infidelity once the healing starts?
He knows that if he wants to attempt to salvage our relationship, he needs to go to therapy regularly and eventually we'll need marriage counseling. It's just so raw for me right now and I also really don't believe a word he says.
It's hard to have hope when you don't trust anything your husband says or promises.
Any good stories? Advice?