hi, Paul - and welcome!
i was 5 when it started, too - and for a long time did not remember anything. most of it has come back to me in the last couple of years. it's hard to know which is worse - not knowing - or having to face it all. if you are anything like me, some of the stories you read here may trigger your own memories - or at least resonnate emotionally - and help you figute it out. this is a very supportive community that i have found to be a major contributor to my recovery.
all the best as you begin your journey with us,
How long, LORD, must I call for help, but you do not listen?
Or cry out to you, “Violence!” but you do not save?
Why do you make me look at injustice?
Why do you tolerate wrongdoing?...
Therefore the law is paralyzed, and justice never prevails....