Next Tuesday I have to go the VA Hospital and get reviewed by a couple people at the PTSD Clinic, about my doctors diagnosis that my rape is considered PTSD, since it happened while I was on active duty. Damn, I just don't know what to think. My doctor also perscribed Zoloft for my anxiety over this, I've been dealing with this for over 22+ years, alone and by myself. I've never talked to anyone about what happened, for fear of retribution and harm to my family if I ever talked. The Zoloft makes me feel more numb when I think about things. I'm not sure I like this medication. It makes me feel detached from my emotions, It make me think that I'm not in touch with my feelings as I was before the medication, but at least I can sleep through the night and not have dreams and night terrors. I haven't been able to cry since taking Zoloft, when think about my family. This I don't like at all. I love and care for my family, and not being able to express my emotions the way I did before the Zoloft is an anxiety within itself.
Is this feeling normal? or am I going nuts?????
Sick and tired of being Sick and tired.