I used to not understand what my husband meant when he told me how difficult things were for him. I didn't get why it was so difficult to practice proper hygiene, to sleep with me, etc. These things are really easy for most people. I basically told him to snap out of it (I didn't know that wasn't possible).
I finally started reading, googling his behaviors...he told me he thinks he has "Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder." So I googled what that meant...I quickly realized I was married to a sick individual who needed help. I found this website and found out that it was possible for my husband to get better. On his own doing. It sounds like you are doing what you can at this moment to heal. I've seen how difficult it is, so congrats to you.
I wonder if your wife cannot accept the fact that you are dealing with a very real ailment (for a lack of better words.) I would try speaking to her differently--not how you may usually speak to her. My husband had to sit me down and tell me just how sick he was for me to really get it...and so I finally jumped on board and accepted the fact that my family is going through a very difficult time. I had so much resentment. I would quietly curse him for affecting my life so much that I needed therapy. I did need therapy because this all affect me too. That was a hard pill to swallow. I had so much resentment for why I was going to therapy when he was the one with the issues. But my way just wasn't working.
Once I accepted what is, my view changed. I used to get so worried that this was my life forever--but this isn't permanent. It sounds like you are working to heal and I know you will be even healthier in the future. It will get better--she just needs to know it takes some time.
Is there any way at all that she would view some of the threads in this forum to get herself more comfortable with what she is dealing with? Maybe she can sit down with you and come to this site? When I signed up, I read so much about why my husband may be feeling what he is feeling. I did soooo much research. And even though I will never fully understand what he goes through in his battle, the knowledge I gained really helped ease my anger and it enabled me to be a better supporter. It sounds so simple--but it worked for me.