Hey Obi,

i believe that people come and go as they need or are able to glean meaningfulness from this site. Everyone so far has said some good things and i cant add too much more to that, except to add my opinion and my experience.

i never judge anyone here. There are always going to be differences in all of us, because we all have been through this CSA, but each has their own reality that came from that experience. So, i try to adjust my thinking to be present in the chat or dialog and try not to let the variety of ways in which guys are able to communicate here get in my way. As in the real world, there are always times when we come across a person who is different in their thoughts and ideas than i am, but i can still listen for understanding and not let their 'style' get in the way.

As was said, everyone is different. You can put 10 people through the same experience and get ten different experiences from that. We are in this together and hopefully that will be the binding that is needed.

Another thought is that everyone is at a different plcae in their own recovery and an area that i am strong in may be anothers struggle at the moment, and so on. We are all similar, but all different.

The things that keep me coming back are:
1. i want to give back to this site and men some of what was given to me. Namely: comfort, safety, others willing to help me and others.

2. We are each uniquely qualified to empathize with each other because of those similarities.

3. i want to be of support to my fellows in this struggle.

4. This site, for me, is a good place to talk to others that are similar minded and empathetic.

Thanks for listening guys. Take care all. i am here and willing to help in any way i can. For those that don't know, this site has a group of men that are called Greeters" who welcome all new members as they come in. i was fortunate to be asked to be a greeter and i am so happy that i have that opportunity to be of service to my fellow survivors.


If you cannot control what happens to you, you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.

~ adapted from: Sri Ram