Originally Posted By: Ninja_Turtle
My situation is a bit different than yours, in that I am wired to repress by often simply not really feeling the anger in the first place, rather than by feeling it and holding it in as you seem to experience.
When you're someone who has the anger driven down deep, as I was and still am to a large degree, sometimes there are even physical reactions that will interfere with your ability to get angry.
As a child I'm sure that it was dangerous for me to be angry because it could have led me to do or say things that my abusers would have retaliated for.
Anyway, I find that myself sometimes I dislike when people (with good intentions) tell me "Express your anger!", because it's so hard to get in touch with it. I can't imagine screaming or using a punching bag or those sorts of things. If someone tried to have me do that I think that what I would experience is an eerie calm, rather than anger, which I'm sure is again a defense.
If not, another thing that's sometimes shockingly helpful is this. When I say something like, "I just don't feel angry, I don't know why I (have this migrane, can't relax, whatever)",

the parts i quoted above really speak for me, too. i may know i am angry or should be - but don't necessarily feel it. i feel upset and often shaky. i can't do anything physical or violent to express it. it is just not me.

what i can do is use words to express it. i can write it or talk through it. that is what helps - and as i have to struggle to pin down exactly what i mean - i start to realize what i am experiencing - not the stereotypical ways that other people recognize anger or demostrate it. my own method - but it works for me.

How long, LORD, must I call for help, but you do not listen?
Or cry out to you, “Violence!” but you do not save?
Why do you make me look at injustice?
Why do you tolerate wrongdoing?...
Therefore the law is paralyzed, and justice never prevails....
Habakkuk 1:2-3