I'm managing to stay up beat lately although school is getting tough, the stress is getting to me and I leave a lot of things to last minute. Otherwise I'm working on myself a lot, trying to change for the better and understanding why I feel certain things. Started therapy, working through things with my girl and my parents. Receiving wonderful support from an unlikely friend from right here on MS.
I hope to keep pushing on in this direction, hopefully that book "Victims no longer" will prove to useful. I still over think things and a bit too critical of myself making me a bit touchy when things aren't overly positive, I'm just glad I pick up on it and try not to dwell on any unhelpful thoughts. It's been about a month and a bit since everything went south and personally I'm glad I've come this far, sort of proud of myself. Naturally I'd like to do better but I know progress is slow, you can't rewire your brain overnight. I'm trying to focus only on the good. It's hard though, especially round midday for some reason, having to keep myself distracted all afternoon to avoid tiring but it seems necessary right now.
For now all I can say is support is key and learning to love yourself is a challenge worth taking on, it's nice knowing you are worth a damn. That you're not what they made you and that there is good in you that no one can take away. The good thing about recovery is that there is no turning back and only good things lie ahead.
Quiet the noises
And leave your ears free to hear
What is going on,
Do not cower in fear
For when the morning rays mate with the leaves
Through your eyes it will be clear,
That there was actually nothing to fear.