must admit that your post made me laughing, mainly because of familiar feelings of incompetency in things that I like when "someone" is watching my execution
Please don't be hard on yourself. Have you forgot on your sensitive difference
That is the partly answer why is sometimes so hard for me to be calm and peaceful while doing something in company of others (and felt like evaluated). Sometimes sensitive person is too much aware of others feelings, stares and thoughts including many different things from surrounding environment. We have problems to shut different sensory stimuli from the outside.
I admire your resolution to be better in golf, wow, is that Sam that likes to take a bear and sit for hours in front of TV or PC (just kidding
Just keep it up, after some first bad impressions and self loathing feelings, everything will settle and you'll feel that learning experience, I'm sure in that
Sometime I need just to be feeling being in known environment (and among known people) to be relaxed and enjoying what ever I do. Your try was victory no matter on bitter taste, you went out and you tried it, wow, that is a lot for first time, next time will be much easier!