i've been through the nightmares phase, too. notice i said "through." it didnt last forever - just seemed like it at times. as they say, "this too shall pass."
about your dream - i don;='t think there is any way to "translate" the objects and events in a neat A=B kind of way.
but just generally speaking - here's what it sounds like to me:
i think you are feeling both vulnerable and at least partially responsible. also fearful about the effects that your past and your present reactions are having on your family and friends.
i think all of that is perfectly understandable and "normal."
hold on - keep working at it - and it WILL get better.
How long, LORD, must I call for help, but you do not listen?
Or cry out to you, “Violence!” but you do not save?
Why do you make me look at injustice?
Why do you tolerate wrongdoing?...
Therefore the law is paralyzed, and justice never prevails....