Dear Kevin,

i was sad to hear of your setback - but not too surprised.

you have been through a major ordeal. losing a mother - or any close family member is difficult enough - without all the other issues you had to deal with. you got through the things you had to do heroically.

and then the backlash came - or the after-shock - or the let-down. i have never experienced fugues like you described - but i know that every time i have a big breakthrough, there is a big reaction right around the corner. it is not at all unusual. it's like you use up all your resistance or adrenaline or whatever on the crisis - and then have no reserves to maintain the status quo.

so - dont feel bad about it. be kind and gentle with yourself. take your time and keep your expectations on hold until you can recover. you have come so far that i am sure that this is only a temporary setback.

"My experience has shown me that I all too often tend to deny that which lies behind, but as I still believe, that which is denied cannot be healed." Brennan Manning, "All is Grace - A Ragamuffin Memoir"