I have only told my wife and my therapist; I'm not prepared to tell my parents at this point. My parents are in their 60s and nearing retirement. My dad went through what I call the "Cats in the Cradle" syndrome a while back---meaning that he is carrying a lot of regret for being away so much during my childhood. He was forever flying here and there to close the deal anywhere from Turkey to Tokyo. He was a great provider, but he missed ball games and swim meets. I thought it was cool having a dad who brought me neat stuff from around the world---but he became miserable later on, so I had to assure him I was fine.

If I revealed the CSA, he'd kick himself for being away and "letting it happen." Maybe when we are both in a better state of mind, I'll let him know.

Those who have read some of my posts know I like to write-it makes me feel better even if I have to go through the fire to get there sometimes. I have written several letters to my abuser that I have no intentions of mailing. I'm doing the same in a letter to my mom and dad. I hate to tell them, but there is a need to. The letters never meant to send are a good surrogate for now.

I've got this life
And the will to show
I will always be
Better than before