Rowan, I'm right there with you. My estranged husband professed his love for me not two weeks after we'd begun dating. I'd thought it was weird but went with it. I grew to love him and the person I believed him to be. But he wasn't that person at all.

I was not an addiction for my husband but instead a distraction, a bandaid and a veil. Right after I found him lying and cheating I threw him out. Disnt find out about the extent of the lies until we were separated, and the CSA almost a year later. It was then that it all makes sense.

Last time I saw him and he did the push/pull with me yet again I implored him to tell me my marriage is over and that he doesn't love me. He could tell me my marriage was over but he could not say he doesn't love me. Said he wouldn't say it because he didn't want to hurt me anymore. Yet I told him that saying it would set me free.

So I loved him and respected him and did everything in my power to successfully preserve his relationship with his adult daughter from his first marriage. But it wasn't enough for him to get help or our marriage to survive.

So no, in my opinion love is not enough. You also need self awareness, honesty and a willingness to truly trust and be vulnerable.