I could have written this post--you are not alone. I wonder every day, "if he loves me, why doesn't he get help? Why does he promise me he will do certain things, and then not?" I don't know the answers as I'm still learning and am in the midst of everything in my own home, but I wanted you to know you are not alone. What helps me is writing and getting my thoughts straight in my head, doing things for me that make me feel good, and learning that I can't control what my H does. Life goes on and life is short so if he chooses to lead his life this way, then so be it. One day he will see everything he missed. So I (try) not to put my energy into efforts that will only be received with anger and doing nothing. I wish you luck and I hope you find some peace.