My name is Patrick and I am glad I have found this space. I was sexually abused by my cousin and then uncle from age 8 until 12 years old, not continuously, but several times. I contemplated suicide many times but never followed through. As I grew up, I learned to hide my feelings and lied to make it through and to medicate myself through pornography. I joined a spiritually abusive church in Pennsylvania trying to become "straight" as I was identifying myself as gay. I did that for 10 years until the leadership grew tired of my not becoming healed and they disfellowshipped me. I moved back to Tennessee and enrolled in college and for a few years did very well. This past March, I lost my job and my world came crashing in around me. I went very deep into pornography and self gratification and have experienced deep depression. I am now
working on eradicating the porn from my life, which is not easy, an am going to a less strict church. I look forward to walking and learning through these forums. Glad to meet you all.