Hey Dark Empathy,

I can relate to everything you said in your last post. As for your question "I am not sure myself how exactly the god working "Through" people thing works", I've found something that I can believe in and testify to.

I have found much support from people in Alanon (12 step recovery program for people affected by other people's drinking). My higher power evolved to listening to the COLLECTIVE wisdom of the people in the group. Not 1 person has the answer to my quandary, but if I put the question and struggle to the group, I can be sure, if I'm patient, to receive the answer from my higher power from the chorus of voices and suggestions and offerings from many people who heard my question / quandary.

It is the collective chorus of voices talking back to me that contains the insight and wisdom that I need to move forward. Since getting smacked back down in my recovery this past month, I've resorted to going to at least 3 or 4 Alanon meetings every week, and to start talking about my struggle. I don't understand how to be intimate, and I don't know how to start trusting people. I hope (faith?) that the answer will come to me through the wisdom of the people gathered together who are all seeking answers to similar issues.