I came here because there are things I want to do but just can't, things I want to feel but just can t feel. Im tired of having people around me and still feeling alone.

I spent some time as a kid living with other families. Mothers shouldn't leave their kids with other people. The first lady to have sex with me I don't know. The others where older cousins. The last tried to make child porn. I feel sorry for the other girl, she cried quite a bit. I was experienced by then and knew what was expected of me.

I was smart in school, tall and handsome on the outside, quite popular although I never spoke. I felt nothing on the inside. Now I'm just tired of being in my head alone all the time. I can't sit here with this junk by myself anymore. I want to clear it out. I want to learn. I want to be able to speak. I want to learn to trust. I want to lust for somebody I love. I want eventually feel like I'm worth something.

I look forward to sharing my story with everyone and hearing other people's stories and progress.


Quiet the noises
And leave your ears free to hear
What is going on,
Right Here.

Do not cower in fear
For when the morning rays mate with the leaves
Through your eyes it will be clear,
That there was actually nothing to fear.