Yep - same here. i was the black sheep.

the youngest of the 4 of us - my 2nd half-brother - was the golden boy to mom. still very obvious.

she would even forget my birthday. and last time i tried to talk to her seriously she had forgotten major events that showed her and the step-dad in a bad light. now, ironically she has dementia - and has forgotten nearly everything. and to think that i used to try to protect her from being hurt by trying to hide my abuse.

and the step-dad treated his own sons like royalty - while my full brother and me were like servants. and if there was ever a choice to be made by mom between him and me - i did not even exist.

there was lots for me to forgive.
"My experience has shown me that I all too often tend to deny that which lies behind, but as I still believe, that which is denied cannot be healed." Brennan Manning, "All is Grace - A Ragamuffin Memoir"