Thank you Puffer. I try to get the ball rolling. I'm trying - sometimes more successfully than others. But something as simple as a kind word from one of you guys really helps because I still sometimes feel alone with this.

The pain gets to me, the mind starts doing things and next thing you know I'm in a funk. Since the conventional wisdom is that it's triggered by stress - though unknown why - I guess my lesson is that it's okay for me to let go of this CSA sh*t for a while, perhaps deal with it at a slower, less intense pace. Sounds strange, but I sometimes forget about the HIV in my quest to appear "normal"...but I need to respect my less obvious physical limitations even though I might otherwise feel fine.