I know these feelings all to well my friend. But it is better that it is out and you can deal with them. I know it doesn't seem like it but it is. It takes guts and a strong person to deal with our issues. We are very strong and very determined to make it.
Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her