This is one of the things that bothers me a lot. Without going into many details like in my survivor story thread,I managed to repress 2 large hunks of my life (both when I was 3~4 from a female preschool teacher and when I was 9~11 or 12 from an older male cousin) and up until Feb 2011 I didn't remember any bits about what went on then.

As a quick disclaimer of sorts, I'm in counseling and I've been diagnosed with PTSD and Major Depressive disorder and also some indications for mild dissociative personality disorder.

Some things that bug me about it:
* I had trouble remembering a lot of the information early on, and when I talked about it to really close friends it flowed out of my mouth like I was making something up on the spot without "remembering" it first it seemed.

*I have a lot of feelings thinking that it cannot be true

*sometimes I would remember stuff almost in a 3rd person view or tell the story in 3rd person. E.g. it didn't happen to me, but "that little boy she did stuff to"

*sometimes I can't remember some things that went on and there are bits and details missing out of the abuse events. Other times there is a ridiculous amount of detail like certain smells or touch sensations.

*sometimes I will see, hear or smell something and I can snap into a certain kind of mindset and remember new things. Once happened when I was working in a facility and seeing the floor tiles suddenly made me remember an event and I got physically sick from that, but never really recalled that memory before then.

*I went from being very emotionless to suddenly being a "crybaby" again like I was when I was younger. I can honestly say that there may have been 1 or 2 occasions when I cried from the age of 13-21, not including a close friend dying in a 4-wheeler accident or a close relative dying. Now emotions seem so fake when they pop up out of nowhere.

So does anyone else have problems with this stuff? I'd appreciate any feedback.