yes - what Val said!
his motives are a key. repeating past = bad. making new path = good.
take it slow and stop if you sense it going wrong.
stay "in touch" with one another - both "present" and aware of each other.
"the scariest thing about abuse of any shape or form, is, in my opinion, not the abuse itself, but that if it continues it can begin to feel commonplace and eventually acceptable."
- Alan Cumming, "Not My Father's Son"