Welcome to MS.
I am glad you have found this place of healing and support.
With over 10,000 members here at MS, you will never be alone or isolated again. Though we have different stories, we have much more in common than we have differences. It is not necessary to "pursue" either one's abuser(s) or institution(s) in which the abuse(s) took place in order to heal. Each of us must choose the path that is best for ourselves.
As for the rollercoaster - this journey we call healing is the wildest ride you will ever experience. Please keep hands and feet in the car and buckle your seat belt.
Take your time and look around. You do not want to trigger yourself by reading too many posts at one time.
At your own pace, read the boards and wander into chat. The lounge (chat) is open 24 hours a day though it isn't always populated.
We also have moderated chats called Healing Circles.
They meet on Sunday and Wednesday evenings at 9pm eastern time and one on Tuesday at 19:00 UTC (European and African time zone) which translates to 2 PM Eastern US time zone. The Healing Circle on Tuesdays is scheduled to resume in September.
Again, welcome to MS.