I feel like I'm experiencing the same thing. Thanks for posting what I was thinking. I'm sure my abuse has something to do it, but I keep thinking I would have more desire if I were having sex with another woman. I think it might have to do with the intimacy of the relationship.

Maybe I'm attracted to other women, because they don't have the potential to hurt me emotionally. This is something I want to talk about with my therapist.
I just want to be me.