He told me the first month we started dating. He also confessed an addiction to phone sex but said it had passed. I discovered after we were married that he was charging a large amount of money every month to phone sex operators. It wasn't until our second year of marriage, after his first one night stand that he confessed to, that I demanded the porn stop, the calls stop, and that he get his *** into therapy. He did for a few months. He stopped. Things calmed down before blowing all to hell 5 years later.

His therapist in 2006 was treating him for PTSD from a work accident. At his last session when the therapist was releasing him, my husband revealed his sexual abuse. The therapist told him they "didn't have time to get into that". Of course, that shut him down for the following years. Only just recently learned that tidbit.

I always knew our problems were related to his abuse but he would shut down at any discussion of it until last year when it became impossible.