So I tried the dog’s new invisible-fence electric collar. I had to know. No...I did not put it on my neck. I held it in my hand with the electrodes on my fingers. The beep-warning sounded as I approached the boundary, then BANG!!! I felt like I was being executed by the state. I could not drop the thing fast enough.

Now, ALL my guy-friends from college, sail-team and grad skool would have lined-up to try it as well, just to prove their veracity on a pain-rich challenge.

My son and his friend would not even consider such a self-test. Maybe it was my flopping and writhing? But no, that serves to enrich the challenge. This non-ape-like behavior from kids today is foreign to me. Am I to be glad or sad?