Posted this in Male survivors - but with more emphasis on my feelings as a survivor myself - thought maybe it would be good to get F & F input too - more on how to help a teen who seems to be in denial:
... wed i read on another thread - too tired to look it up - about a threrapist who said that nearly all kids who do cutting have a history of abuse. I have a kid in my class that i thought of immediately and it was liek a stab to the heart.
Great guy - liked by everyone, talented, handsome, easygoing, friendly, etc... but he has lots of scars on both arms and doesn't even try to hid them and now has a big bandage and stitches. we have a pretty good rapport. I asked him to stay after class about an assignment and then told him wht i'd read. then i asked him point-blank - has anyone ever messed with you in any way? he said no. i asked again - i understand if you're embarassed - told him it could be other kinds of abuse - emotional, physical, verbal - that i'd been there and didn't want him to waste years of his life and then have it come back to bite him - like me. he needs to deal with it and get help. he said no again. told him whatever the issues he's struggling with - there is help available. don't try to do it alone. let him go, still denying...
Next day he was sick - parents came in to get assignments and becaus i told them i had another matter to discuss. Good talk - over an hour. they are aware f the problem - have him under prof care weekly and meds and lots more. they don't know what the root cause is - i believe them. they were glad someone else at school is aware and cares. sad case - really want to help - feel terrible bout it but cant do more than i have...
positive thoughts, suggestions, and prayers welcome - for BOTH of us!!!
"My experience has shown me that I all too often tend to deny that which lies behind, but as I still believe, that which is denied cannot be healed." Brennan Manning, "All is Grace - A Ragamuffin Memoir"