Posted this in Male survivors - but with more emphasis on my feelings as a survivor myself - thought maybe it would be good to get F & F input too - more on how to help a teen who seems to be in denial:
... wed i read on another thread - too tired to look it up - about a threrapist who said that nearly all kids who do cutting have a history of abuse. I have a kid in my class that i thought of immediately and it was liek a stab to the heart.
Great guy - liked by everyone, talented, handsome, easygoing, friendly, etc... but he has lots of scars on both arms and doesn't even try to hid them and now has a big bandage and stitches. we have a pretty good rapport. I asked him to stay after class about an assignment and then told him wht i'd read. then i asked him point-blank - has anyone ever messed with you in any way? he said no. i asked again - i understand if you're embarassed - told him it could be other kinds of abuse - emotional, physical, verbal - that i'd been there and didn't want him to waste years of his life and then have it come back to bite him - like me. he needs to deal with it and get help. he said no again. told him whatever the issues he's struggling with - there is help available. don't try to do it alone. let him go, still denying...
Next day he was sick - parents came in to get assignments and becaus i told them i had another matter to discuss. Good talk - over an hour. they are aware f the problem - have him under prof care weekly and meds and lots more. they don't know what the root cause is - i believe them. they were glad someone else at school is aware and cares. sad case - really want to help - feel terrible bout it but cant do more than i have...
positive thoughts, suggestions, and prayers welcome - for BOTH of us!!!
"the scariest thing about abuse of any shape or form, is, in my opinion, not the abuse itself, but that if it continues it can begin to feel commonplace and eventually acceptable."
- Alan Cumming, "Not My Father's Son"