L.A.D.
Ah yes - we're among the 2/3 of survivors who DON'T act out in that way and become perps ourselves. But what do you always hear about? The 1/3 who end up as abusers. And you even hear the statement "MANY" victims become abusers themselves." OK - so 1/3 is a terrible amount - BUT it is not the majority! And it makes me cry inside every time I hear it. Makes me want to dig my hole deeper and bury myself without any thought of coming up again. I don't dare tell my story because I'll automatically be branded as a pedo/perp. Regardless of the fact that I am so tied up in knots that I can't have any kind of physical relationship - whether normal or abnormal - it's all equally scary. Suddenly I become a suspect instead of a victim. This issue comes closest to making me mad of just about anything - and my anger has been pretty effectively anesthetized by my perps, too - along with nearly every other emotion - healthy or not. I'd rather die than hurt anyone else like I was hurt. That's the biggest deterrent I can imagine.
- Lee

_________________________
"the scariest thing about abuse of any shape or form, is, in my opinion, not the abuse itself, but that if it continues it can begin to feel commonplace and eventually acceptable."
- Alan Cumming, "Not My Father's Son"