Welcome to the MS community! I am very pleased that a lot of our brothers jumped in to welcome you and support you; everyone have shared their wisdom with you. I hope that you got the answer you're seeking.

I was born into a hard core Catholic family and therefore I was a hardcore Catholic myself until I was sexually abused by three different priests. Like you I had my doubts and in my case I was dealing with a lot of shame.

I kept hearing, that I was not worthy of going to heaven and so on, so I tried to fight the fact that I am gay and one thing I happened to read in the bible is that "God is Love", so If God is love, how can He hate me? God loves everyone!!!

I believe you said something that is so true, that religion is led by men (mankind), and as men it's going to be shaped the way the way the majority of
them think it should be, and then they brake their own rules.

I'd say to you God loves you just like He loves everyone else regardless of your sexual orientation. Being a survivor of sexual abuse and being gay is two different things. You can't count the abuse as an actual sex act, it was abuse,! Regardless of the perpetrator's gender. Lots of our brothers have said so many great and wise things about this subject, but I will quote Daryl because he puts it very simply:

If I could not be gay and a survivor then I would not be a true survivor in my life. I happen to be both.

I identify with that myself. It took me years to accept myself, just the way I am. A survivor and a gay man, and I'm happy to have accepted myself just the way I am. If i cannot love myself the way I am, how can I expect someone else to love me the same way?

We are all survivors and we all welcome you as such, regardless of your sexual orientation and/or your religious believes. I think no one can say they are a true Christian if they are not capable of loving everyone else as they love themselves, just like God loves everyone because I was always told "God is Love", and, he loves unconditionally, so I keep that in mind when anyone tries to make me believe that God does not loves me for being gay.

Again, welcome our survivor brother, no one is here to judge you, but to heal and if someone has an issue with who are, let it be their issue not yours, here or anywhere else. May you find the healing you seek.

So, to answer your question. Yes, you can be gay and a survivor.


A very grateful Alumni of the Level I WoR Sequoia 2011, Ben Lohmond, CA, USA
and Advanced WoR Alta 2011, Alta, UT, USA.

The strength of a man isn't in the weight he can lift; it is the burdens he can understand and overcome.