I keep logging into the MS site, hoping to find a new post on the ASA forum, but not seeing any...

I dunno ...i just want to feel a kindred spirit with other guys with ASA. Honestly, i just want to feel something, anything besides this empty void i carry.

I don't feel any emotions regarding my rapes, actually ...not the dissasociative kind, just nothing anymore. No anger or sadness or shame. Just ...nothing. Makes me think "did it really happen?" but i know it did.

The only time i feel any emotions or get any healing it seems, is when i get the chance to reach out to my brothers in need, but it just isn't happening anymore it seems.

Where is everyone? I don't want to push, i just wonder. Are you hiding? Are you afraid to post? Or are you afraid of hurting someone on here? I dunno ...just feeling lost and numb right now ...and lonely.

My Story...