My trouble has been a fluctuation between being non sexual to being overly sexual. I think in my case it has to do with intimacy issues more than anything else. If our personalities do not match nothing is desired from her no matter how wonderfull she looks or acts. Hell I could go to bed with Hali Berry and if there is no intelectual connection or intimacy connection -- well the abuse issues I have create a wall that even I cannot climb over. It Pains me to admit it but thats the truth.