I think this kind of fantasy is common, much like a cop/prisoner fantasy is, or the straight interest in teacher/schoolgirl roleplays. In each of these examples there are elements of control or the loss of it, depending on the role you wish to play, which like I said is common in many people's fantasy life, whether they were sexually abused or not in their histories. As a survivor I think you just have to ask yourself whether realizing such fantasies is adding to your sexual fulfillment or detracts from other aspects of your life. If you feel its just for fun and of no consequence then that's fine. I've done the same. However, if deep down inside this type of fantasy feels like a way of working out past issues then I would be concerned since it will frustrate you rather than help you find understanding and closure in the end. JS

Love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world.