I've heard masturbastion likened to an act of sin against
1. The temple of the Holy Spirit
2. The "Image of God"

For me and I think many others it's foundation is definitely in a sinful act. Trying to take care of what ever it is going on inside us, on our own, with no reliance on God to do so. Be it an attempt to get rid of anxiety, or stress, or fulfill some missing need or deep longing in our heart that we don't know what to do with.

So I think the ultimate question is... how do we not do that? I mean take care of our needs ourselves? For me this is especially hard, as growing up, especially with my emotional needs, I had to take care of it all because my parents were completely emotional bankrupt. So how can I let go and trust that those needs will be met and not continually fall back into the same sin?

You're on the button with your paraphrase Allen. If you look at the statement that Christ made, it wasn't the look that was responsible for the sin, but the condition of the heart of the person doing the looking. I've heard many guys over the years say that "there's nothing wrong with looking..." but that's definitely not true for all people.... the real question is, why are you looking, and.... that goes straight back to a heart conidition issue.