There's an ambivalence when it comes to an abused man's sexuality. It's like everything we know about love, sex, intimacy and abuse get all tangled up.

I don't consider myself gay, straight or bi, but something is not hooking up right. The weird thing about this is that I hate being around other men because I don't meet the physical standards of what it means to be a man. But, I can have sex with one at the drop of a dime, even though I'm on automatic pilot during the encounter.

I hat this confusion with such a passion, I could burn a hole through through the Earth right now.

Hey, if "black sheep" means you're the only non-douche of the family, take that with some pride.