My grandfather a devout Catholic and an asshole introduced me to Catholicism. He showed me the rosary and how to pray to the Virgin Mary. Then he went and had sex with my sister.

As an adult I have often spent time praying the Church but have never been a full-on Catholic. I was talking about this with a local Catholic lay leader and he reminded me that I wasn't really Catholic because I hadn't experienced all of the the Sacrements yet and shouldn't take communion because "I was trying to have my cake and eat it too" without embracing their beliefs 100%.

I wanted to beat the fuck out of him. He knows my story. I've suffered enough from my "Catholic" grandfather. I don't think I need to embrace a Church that let thousands of kids be abused before trying to stop it.

The Church was not there for me when I needed it so I don't know why I should obey it.

Sean Simms

"When you are Real you can't be ugly. People who think you are ugly just don't understand."
-the Velveteen Rabbit