Well, I can relate to the origional post. My father abused me and he was a pastor/preacher/evangelist. God used him even while the abuse was going on. I REALLY struggled with this. I don't have any real answers. I did however, eventually return to God. I talked with him about it. Especially after my father died. I know that something tried and might have succeeded in destroying my father. It tried to destroy me to. However everytime I called on him he was there for me. Did he stop my father from hurting me. No. He didn't stop me from hurting others either. That was my choice. I wlll be accountable for the choices I made. Not the choices of others. I know he suffered with me and with those I hurt. Just like my dad he gave me life and I am free to do with it what ever I want. I can do good or I can do evil. Most of the time he will not interfere unless asked and even then he will not control another life just for my sake. I don't fully understand but then I am just a man and not a very good one at that. Some day I hope to understand it better.